I have a dear friend who is very ill. She has a message for everyone. It may sound simple. It may sound cliché. You may want to sweep it under the rug. I know she did years ago when I confronted her. I know a couple of other people in my life right now that I have talked to recently that are ignoring the message because it just will not “happen to me.” They have even gotten mad at me. Guess what, I don’t care.
Here is her message. Two simple words.
On another note:
I’ve been thinking again. I know.. It’s been a while since I brought my thoughts to print…but a lot has occurred since our last “visit.” A lot of things that has my head spinning, instances that has brought me to sobriety so to speak. A lot of things that has made me wonder… “What is my brand?”
I cannot help but wonder… when my time to leave this earth arrives, what will I be labeled as? What is the first thing people would say about me? “Oh, that girl, she was known for ________ !” “Rachel was such a _______.” “She was always ______ !” What kind of legacy will I leave behind? Will my family and my friends have nice things to say. Will I leave behind a mass of people who feel obligated to say something nice at my funeral? I don’t want to be that person that get’s a generic greeting card because the personal ones are lies. Know what I mean?? I don’t want to be that person that the preacher says something nice about at my funeral and everyone knows it’s a line of malarky…just because you have to say something nice.
Why the morbid thoughts you ask?? Death surrounds me. I’m thinking on these people who have made such an impact on my life. Good people. Kind people. Mostly. And then those who are not. Those who are teetering on the edge of self-destruction. Those whose lives could be claimed at any moment. What if something happened to them today?? What if they lost their lives? What is their legacy? What will they be remembered as? What impression will they leave?
It’s sad. And I cannot help thinking on these things. Does it really matter once you are “gone?” I say YES! Because once you are gone….you aren’t really gone. At least not in the hearts of those that loved you. Their memories will always be there. Whether good or bad. I’ve had people leave this earth that will never leave my mind or my memories. And sadly, some of these people left me with a negative label of them in my mind.
I am not here to impress people or change the world. I am not here to be a star or be in the spotlight. But I do want people to think of me and think more good than bad. I have bad qualities. I have plenty of negative things that people could say. But I hope and I pray that those things are far enough down the list that the first things that come to the surface are positive.